OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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