remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
