I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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