We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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