Where did you get a picture of my penis
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
