I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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