Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
