There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
