I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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