you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
