My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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