it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
