Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i think i have two assholes
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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