I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
