in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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