I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
