This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
