I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
