How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
kristin has been a bad kristin
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
