Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
