dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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