he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
