I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
