You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
