my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize