i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
