I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I need help removing her.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
What a dumb baby whore.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize