I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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