I like my sex mixed with concussions.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
