She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
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