he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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