I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Randomize
