You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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