Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
