If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
4 words: hood of his car
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
