I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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