where am i from again
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
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