Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
