Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
