I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize