so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
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