So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
