okay pat passed out under dana's car
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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