Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
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