They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize