You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
