I wish I only lived at night.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
