I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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