Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
