i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
